Sunday, May 30, 2021

Thank Vietnam Veterans for healing #PTSD

PTSD Patrol and Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
May 30, 2021

Every Memorial Day, I cry more than most people. Almost everyone thinks about the lives lost during wars, but few think about all those who died because of the wars they fought. It also grieves me that most Americans fighting their own battles with PTSD, have no clue that the help they receive, was created because Vietnam Veterans came home and fought for all of it.

While I got involved almost forty years ago, the Afghanistan and Iraq veterans ended up getting all the attention because their generation was coming home, suffering, and committing suicide. The problem was, the majority of the veteran suicides known, were mostly over the age of fifty. In other words, pre-9 11 veterans, but few seemed to care.

In 2015 I did a video with Mike and the Mechanics song The Living Years. Vietnam Veterans Remembered was to let them know that someone was paying attention to what was still happening to them.
When I lived in Florida, I always recorded the escort of the Wall going into Wickham Park. I used that footage along with images from Vietnam, Iraq and Afghanistan because of the lyrics of the song. Too many forget that war they fought and too many do not know they are still fighting it.
"So we open up a quarrel Between the present and the past"
No Vietnam veteran wants to take away from the newer generations. They took a vow to fight for all generations. The thing is, they don't want to be pushed aside. It should never be one generation being helped while sacrificing the other generations.

Once in a while I go back through some old emails. This is from 2006 about the book I wrote, For The Love Of Jack. I wrote it about our generation before 2001 and then self published it to help the newer generation that would follow them, and their families. That is something I learned from them...to fight for all generations.
Thank you so much for sharing your pain and story, You have helped me with my family and you dont even know it....As I read your story I was sitting there realising that you were talking about me in so many ways...the way I had become and the way I was headed. And Yes I am a combat Vet, from a long line of vets.......if I could just find out why there is no answers...........But I wanted to say thank you.......

Let the images sink in on this video because the pictures from Afghanistan and Iraq were the only ones people seemed to care about, but the older generations waited longer, suffered longer and still fought for the newer generation so that they would not end up like them.

The thing is, my generation is still fighting so that the newer generation does not have to suffer instead of healing the wounds they carried for far too long. We are retiring and dying off but doing all we can "in the living years."

When Vietnam veterans came home and fought for all the research on Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, they were concentrating on what happens to those who fight the wars for this country. They had no clue that their efforts would end up helping everyone with PTSD. If you have PTSD and are getting help to heal, and you see a Vietnam veteran, say "thank you" to them because you have the hope of healing because of them.


Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

The Living Years
Song by Mike + The Mechanics

Every generation
Blames the one before
And all of their frustrations
Come beating on your door
I know that I'm a prisoner
To all my Father held so dear
I know that I'm a hostage
To all his hopes and fears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years
Oh, crumpled bits of paper
Filled with imperfect thought
Stilted conversations
I'm afraid that's all we've got
You say you just don't see it
He says it's perfect sense
You just can't get agreement
In this present tense
We all talk a different language
Talking in defence
Say it loud (say it loud), say it clear (oh say it clear)
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late (it's too late) when we die (oh when we die)
To admit we don't see eye to eye
So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
It's the bitterness that lasts
So don't yield to the fortunes
You sometimes see as fate
It may have a new perspective
On a different day
And if you don't give up, and don't give in
You may just be okay
So say it loud, say it clear (oh say it clear)
You can listen as well as you hear
Because it's too late, it's too late (it's too late) when we die (oh when we die)
To admit we don't see eye to eye
I wasn't there that morning
When my Father passed away
I didn't get to tell him
All the things I had to say
I think I caught his spirit
Later that same year
I'm sure I heard his echo
In my baby's new born tears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years
Say it loud, say it clear (oh say it clear)
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late (it's too late) when we die (it's too late when we die)
To admit we don't see eye to eye
So say it, say it, say it loud (say it loud)
Say it clear (come on say it clear)

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: B.A. Robertson / Mike Rutherford (gb)
The Living Years lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Concord Music Publishing LLC

Saturday, May 29, 2021

Take your passion and make it happen

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 29, 2021

"First when there's nothing but a slow glowing dream, that your fear seems to hide deep inside your mind." The featured video today is What A Feeling from Flashdance. Listening to this song made me very happy because I've been thinking a lot about retiring. Next year, it will be forty years since I had a dream of making things better for people with PTSD. That's a long time for anyone!

I feel so much better thinking about it now because of one of the groups I discovered, using music, a message and trying to save people from suicide. Sounds Of Saving is doing the work I do and doing it a lot better than I ever could.
Songs that save lives
Music has been clinically proven to have a positive impact on mental health. The right song can affect our psychobiological stress system and create feelings of motivation, happiness and relaxation.
We think the world should know that music can fight mental illness.

"Take your passion and make it happen." That is what came into my head when I was reading and listening to what they are doing. When you are passionate about something, share it. If you are an artist and find a new way of doing something, do it. You may not be the best artist, but you can inpsire a better one and the beauty gets out into the world. You may love to write but never had the support or someone to publicize your work (been there and done that) but your words can inspire others and the world changes.

I often think about all the others who were involved with defeating PTSD long before me and wonder how they feel about what ended up happening because of "slow glowing dream" of healing they started when there was nothing before they came along.

The goal is to save lives and help people find a new way to live, healing instead of suffering. With Sounds Of Saving out there, along with a lot of other groups, they will make it happen.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 
Flashdance...What A Feeling
Irene Cara 

First when there's nothing
But a slow glowing dream
That your fear seems to hide
Deep inside your mind
All alone I have cried
Silent tears full of pride
In a world made of steel
Made of stone
Well, I hear the music
Close my eyes, feel the rhythm
Wrap around, take a hold of my heart
What a feeling (what a feeling), beings believing (beings believing)
I can have it all now I'm dancing for my life
Take your passion (what a feeling) and make it happen (beings believing)
Pictures come alive you could dance right through your life
Now I know, I got the chance
To reach the top, is so intense
In a world made of steel
Made of stone
Now I hear the music
Close my eyes I am rhythm
In a flash it takes hold
Of my heart
What a feeling (what a feeling), beings believing (beings believing)
I can have it all now I'm dancing for my life
Take your passion (what a feeling) and make it happen (beings believing)
Pictures come alive you could dance right through your life
I feel the passion, deep inside
I got strength, I got pride
In a world made of steel
Made of stone
Dancing, till the end of this night
Like now or never, got strength and pride
When I feel the music I'm losing control
Of my mind, my body, my heart and my soul
Let's go, make this dream come true
For me and for you, we can dance right through
You can have it all, there's no price to pay
Your feelings will show you the way
What a feeling (what a feeling), beings believing (beings believing)
I can have it all now I'm dancing for my life
Take your passion (what a feeling) and make it happen (beings believing)
Pictures come alive you could dance right through your life
What a feeling (what a feeling), beings believing (beings believing)
What a feeling (what a feeling), beings believing (beings believing)
What a feeling 
I can have it all now I'm dancing for my life
What a feeling

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Irene Cara / Giorgio Moroder / Keith Forsey
Flashdance...What A Feeling lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner Chappell Music, Inc 

Friday, May 28, 2021

For all the brave and the souls who went before us

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 28 2021

It is Memorial Day weekend and I always get reflective. My Dad and all my uncles, first generation Americans, fought in 2 wars. My husband's Dad and uncles, also first generation Americans, fought in WWII, and he fought in Vietnam.

They were all raised to understand how important it was to fight for something they believed in. They believed in this country. Each one of them paid a price for their service. Some of them lost buddies. Each year, we would go to parades and cemeteries to acknowledge their service. When I was young, I never thought about the day when I would to go cemeteries to visit their graves.

There is so much we can learn by what they did and what they did it for.  They did it for each other, for their families and for the future. Please forgive me if the reflections I have had over the last few months bother you but considering how the majority of the American people feel, I am no different.

While this nation seems to be one way, the truth is, only some are. Those who want answers and accountability, are the majority, but for years everyone assumed I was a Republican because I associated with them in veterans groups. I never felt free to say what I believed. My job was to help veterans and families with PTSD and I was forced to put that first.

I had to listen to them saying how much they hated Democrats. Tell all kinds of lies they believed were true and then pretend that they were not political when they wanted new members.

The thing is, my Dad, my uncles were all Democrats. My Mom and aunts were. Yet I had to hear what the people I spent so much time with actually thought about the people I loved the most....sad. I had to listen to them talk about how much they would have hated the people I loved...and how much they would have hated me. 

No matter what I did to help people, including them, none of that mattered as soon as I stopped being silent and said what I thought. None of them ever thought about how what they said all those years hurt me, or made me feel. 

This is why today the featured video is Change, Christina Aguilera.

If you have PTSD, especially if you have PTSD, taking back your life means being able to speak your mind. Being free to express yourself is a real freedom and generation after generation of men and women risked their lives to protect that right. Some of them were Republican and some, like my family, were Democrats. None of that mattered when they were serving side by side and willing to die for those they were with. Today, somehow that changed into something I no longer recognize as such, especially after what happened at the Senate today when only 6 Republicans voted for the investigation into what happened when the Capital itself was attacked.

Freedom is empowering, but only if you use it. So when you hear someone in your life, talk about how much they hate, talk about those you loved and honor that love. Do it "for all the brave souls who went before us" and then, if necessary, walk away from them. You do not need that kind of oppression in your life.  There was a time when I would have said to just set the political divide aside, but those days are long gone. One day, we may return to a time when differences made us stronger because we valued each other instead of constantly hearing how much we are hated for what we believe.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
This is how you #BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife 




Change
Christina Aguilera

When I was young I would look in the mirror
Didn't know it then but now it couldn't be clearer
I remember being filled with such wonder
Before learning that the world could be harsher
Who
Who you love or the color of your skin
Or the place that you were born and grew up in
Shouldn't decide how you will be treated
Cause we're all the same when everybody's breathing
Waiting for a change to set us free
Waiting for the day when you can be you and I can be me
Waiting for hope to come around
Waiting for the day when hate is lost and love is found
Waiting for a change,
Waiting for a change
Change, change...
For all the brave and the souls who went before us
Stand tall be proud and lift your voices
Let 'em know who we are and our choices
And one day we won't have to sing this chorus
Waiting for a change to set us free
Waiting for the day when you can be you and I can be me
Waiting for hope to come around
Waiting for the day when hate is lost and love is found
Waiting for a change,
Waiting for a change
Change, change...
Hold on
Waiting for a change
Change
When I was young I would look in the mirror
Didn't see it then but now it couldn't be clearer

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Christina Aguilera / Martin Terefe / Jake Hagood / Florian Reutter
Change lyrics © West Eight Music Publishing, Super Big Music 

If GOP Senators block investigation of Capitol attack, remember all of it

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 28, 2021


Yesterday Capitol Police Officer Brian Sicknick's Mother paid a visit to GOP members of the Senate begging them to vote for the investigation as to who was behind the attack so that people would be held accountable for what they did leading to his death, and injuries of the other officers, and the threat that is still hanging over all of them that it can happen again.

If Republicans refuse to have the investigation into the Capitol attack, remember their names as much as we remember what they already said.

"There is no question, done, that President Trump is practically and morally responsible for provoking the event of the day." That is what Mitch McConnell said before he tried to explain why he voted against impeaching Trump for it.

One by one, Republicans who were repulsed by what happened, on that horrible day, decided that it was time to just move on and forget about it. What made all of this worse, is what they ended up doing and saying afterwards. Now, they are trying to block holding people accountable for it by investigating exactly what happened. That is what is owed to the American people and all those who serve the people in the People's House.

“If you didn't know that TV footage was a video from January the sixth, you would actually think it was a normal tourist visit.” Rep. Andrew Clyde

“As one of the members who stayed in the Capitol, and on the House floor, who with other Republican colleagues helped barricade the door until almost 3 p.m. from the mob who tried to enter, I can tell you the House floor was never breached and it was not an insurrection. This is the truth,” Clyde claimed.

Does that mean he does that on a normal basis for normal tourists?
Republican loyal to Trump claims Capitol riot looked more like 'normal tourist visit' The comments by Rep. Andrew Clyde, R-Ga., during a House Oversight Committee marked the latest attempt by some Republicans to revise the narrative around the deadly Capitol riot.


UPDATE: The votes are in. It failed because only 6 Republican Senators voted for it...you can read more on ABC
Democrats needed 10 Republicans to join them to overcome the GOP filibuster but only Sens. Mitt Romney of Utah, Susan Collins of Maine, Murkowski of Alaska, Ben Sasse of Nebraska, Rob Portman of Ohio and Bill Cassidy of Louisiana voted to advance the legislation.

Wednesday, May 26, 2021

I see myself in a brand new way

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 26, 2021

No one can change a damn thing that has already happened. The only thing in our power is to change what we do about it afterwards. There are many things that can eat away at us, but not being able to predict the future should not be one of them.

I was reading about Bernie and Phyl's daughter Pepe blaming herself for Bernie dying of COVID-19 last year. She stayed with her parents to look after them when things started shutting down. Pepe is going through what a lot of people are, blaming themselves for something they had very little control over.

None of us are super humans. Whatever you think you could have done, or how many scenarios you come up with in your own mind, none of them are humanly possible.

Pepe, like most of the world, was just learning about what the pandemic could do and how it would do it. Nothing can take away the guilt she feels until she forgives herself for doing the best she could, with what she knew, at the time she knew it. Researchers and people were just trying to figure out this new pandemic, so most people knew very little about it.

If you have PTSD, a lot of the time you are also dealing with survivor guilt. That is a heavy load to carry. Much too heavy for anyone and it is time you put it down. That burden is one that should have never been laid upon your shoulders. Besides, you have things to do with the rest of your life to be the best person you can be after surviving.

Stop trying to figure out why you lived but others didn't. That is a question that you'll never be able to answer and was not something that you had control over. You do control what you do with your life.

Heal and be better. Be happier and then pass it all onto someone else who feels just as beaten down as you do. Lift them up. Spend the rest of your life making this world a little better than it would have been without you.

Pepe is doing that. She is speaking out so that other families who lost someone to COVID-19, can find support and gain strength knowing they are not alone. With almost 600,000 lives lost, that is a lot of families who need to know that message!

Today the featured video is Boston Don't Look Back. It is time to see yourself in a brand new way!


Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
‘A living nightmare’: Daughter of Bernie and Phyllis Rubin struggling with guilt after unwittingly exposing parents to coronavirus
WHDH 7 News
BY KIMBERLY BOOKMAN
MAY 25, 2021
It was March of last year and the entire family was in south Florida for Phyls 80th birthday party. Pepe said she decided to stay and care for her parents as the country started to shut down. She said she believes she contracted the virus at a grocery store and then spread it to her parents.

Her 82-year old father — who in life was surrounded by people — died in a hospital bed by himself.

“Knowing what a tragic ending he had alone – and us not being there – it was just a living nightmare,” said Pepe.

She met 7NEWS at the company’s headquarters in Norton — where sports memorabilia line the walls.

Bernie’s office is just how he left it, filled with photos of his wife, three kids, 10 grandchildren, and one great-grandchild.

Pepe said his death had her walking around in a fog for the last year.

“One of my daughters said to me ‘We know we lost our grandfather but we didn’t realize we lost you too because I deal with a lot of anxiety…and guilt,” she said.  
Now that the country is reopening and life is resuming for so many, Pepe said she is forever changed. read more here

Don't Look Back
Boston

Don't look back, ooh, a new day is breakin'
It's been too long since I felt this way
I don't mind, ooh, where I get taken
The road is callin', today is the day
I can see, it took so long just to realize
I'm much too strong not to compromise
Now I see what I am is holding me down
I'll turn it around
Oh, yes, I will
I finally see the dawn arrivin'
I see beyond the road I'm drivin'
It's a bright horizon, ooh, and I'm awaken
I see myself in a brand new way
The sun is shinin', ooh, the clouds are breakin'
'Cause I can't lose now, there's no game to play
I can tell there's no more time left to criticize
I've seen what I could not recognize
Everything in my life was leading me on
But I can be strong
Oh, yes I can
I finally see the dawn arrivin'
I see beyond the road I'm drivin'
Ooh, far away, I'm left behind, left behind
Oh, the sun is shining
And I'm on that road
Don't look back, ooh, a new day is breakin'
It's been so long since I felt this way
I don't mind, ooh, where I get taken
The road is callin', today is the day
I can see, it took so long just to realize
I'm much too strong not to compromise
Now I see what I am is holding me down
I'll turn it around
Oh, yes I will
I finally see the dawn arrivin'
I see beyond the road I'm drivin'
I'm far away and left behind
Don't look back
Don't look back
Don't look back
Don't look back

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Scholz Tom
Don’t Look Back lyrics © Pure Songs, Hideaway Hits

Tuesday, May 25, 2021

"the smiles returning to the faces"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 25, 2021

I think I have spring fever! I just got back after being out on this beautiful day and noticing how many people are smiling again. That is what getting vaccinated does. I wear a mask when I am shopping on in enclosed spaces with strangers, but it is off when I am with friends or walking around. Seeing people smile is a wonderful thing, instead of just seeing their eyes crinkle up above their masks. People are a lot happier.

That is what it is like healing PTSD. You do what you need to do to recover and you end up with spring fever too. You get happier. The people in your life get happier. Your family and friends, co-workers end up happier. Maybe they didn't know what was going on with you, but they knew something was happening inside of you. They also noticed when things started to turn around for you.

Today the featured video is The Beatles, Here Comes The Sun. It has been a "long, cold lonely winter." But the sun is coming back and so is your smile.

Enjoy being able to enjoy healing and being happier!


Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Here Comes The Sun (Take 9)
The Beatles

Here comes the sun do, do, do
Here comes the sun
And I say it's all right
Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter
Little darling, it seems like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun do, do, do
Here comes the sun
And I say it's all right
Little darling, the smiles returning to the faces
Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun do, do, do
Here comes the sun
And I say it's all right
Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting
Little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear
Here comes the sun do, do, do
Here comes the sun
And I say it's all right
Here comes the sun do, do, do
Here comes the sun
And I say it's all right

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: George Harrison
Here Comes The Sun (Take 9) lyrics © Harrisongs Ltd 

Monday, May 24, 2021

Live for those you love and heal

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 24, 2021

Today the featured video is one I did back in 2012. Alive Day with Donna Summer, I Will Live For Love. I created it when I was working with veterans and their families. It was a few years after I started posting on Wounded Times about the rise in suicides within the military and among veterans. Back then it was thought that there were 18 veterans committing suicide everyday and it was my effort to get them, along with the members of the military to think about PTSD in a different way.

All humans need to think about PTSD and mental health in a different way. Why you didn't see Post Bulletin footage of a suicide attempt? was the headline from The Post Bulletin by Jeff Pieters (May 21, 2021) about a repoter capturing the moment when a suicide was prevented by Police Officers. The reason they made the choice to not release the footage is something that all of us should pay attention to...and oh, by the way, I totally approve!
News reporting that informs you sometimes can hurt vulnerable people. Here's how one coverage decision was made.
As humans in society, we have an interest in our fellow people, the different ways they live their lives, the things that they achieve, and the fates that sometimes befall them. We expect, in our free society, to be informed. And yes, there will be hard and unpleasant stories in the Post Bulletin from time to time.

But when there is a cost to the subject, we have to weigh that against the public's desire to know. Does someone who has a drug addiction deserve to be spotlighted for his or her fairly minor misdeeds? Should the sight of somebody having their worst day — a mental health breakdown on a highway bridge in Rochester — be put on display to thousands of pairs of eyes?

And, as Gayle reminded me, sometimes it's more than the individual who bears the cost of the stigma and shame. "There's so little awareness of the impact on families," she said. "The hidden, invisible and innocent victims."

In the end, after much thought and discussion, we made the choice. We would not publish or post our images of what happened on that bridge.
It is never just the one with PTSD or any other mental health condition, but their families as well. I know what it is like to be "family" as well as what it is like to be the "one" dealing with depression so sever I was praying that God would let me die. It was after my daughter was born and I had walked around with an infection for months before it took over my body. I was in the hospital and so sad about things that I just didn't want to do any of it anymore. (Long story but you can read it in For The Love Of Jack) My husband came into the room when I woke up. He had our daughter in his arms. I looked at her and I knew I couldn't leave her. I decided to live for love.


Part of the reason why I stopped working exclusively with veterans and families was the fact that somehow the desire to expose the fact suicides were going up among veterans and members of the military, so that someone would do something to prevent them, was replaced by people making a lot of noise and money off the fact they were doing it. Prevention efforts were drowned out by the ever crowded growing numbers of people wanting fame and fortune instead of saving lives. Suicide prevention was replaced by suicide awareness. As more and more people were committing suicide, the focus and funding was all about veterans. I thought it was time that all us humans were worthy of living.

Maybe that is why most people decide to fight to take back our lives from whatever we're fighting. The people will love are worth fighting for. That is why I Will Live For Love is the featured video today.

Let it be your alive day and live for those you love by healing and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
 
Dream-a-Lot’s Theme (I Will Live for Love)
Donna Summer

There's got to be a way that I can dream
Simply close my eyes and see
The worlds I've never known
What places that my soul has been
Sometimes I need to run away and hide
And soar above the clouds and ride
I sail along so high
Till nothing's in my sky
Except the stars that fill my eyes
And I will live for love
Where ever it may lead
It's written from the start
I know it's face by heart
I will live for love
I'm searching for the one who holds the key
To all this crazy life I lead
Through galaxies in time
A solitary star that joins
Sometimes I need to close my eyes and breathe
Inhale what life's been given me
A passion to ignite
A flaming heart a' flight
I close my eyes
I breathe
I'm free
And I will live for love
Where ever it may lead
It's written from the start
I know it's face by heart
I will live for love
The poet must have known
A lover of his own
"Cause that is when he wrote
Everything I felt for love
And I will fight for love in life and life in love
And I will hold to things above
I'm strong enough to slay the dragon dead and there
I will live for love
I'm taller than the sky
This dream will never die
So only know that I
I will live for love
The poet must have known
A lover of his own
That is when he wrote everything I felt for love
I will ever fight
I will live for life
I will live for love

Genius Lyrics 

Sunday, May 23, 2021

Come soak this dry heart with healing rain

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 23, 2021

A drug addict, a drunk and a homeless man were alone, lost and lonely. Then someone came to invite them to get soaked in the rain. That was probably the only invitation they had in years. The featured video today is Michael Smith, Healing Rain. I bet you thought that was going to be a joke.

Because the pandemic hit only a few months after we moved to New Hampshire, we didn't know too many people. It was really hard being isolated and not knowing our way around. The blessing was, our daughter was already here, which is why we moved. Some friends we had many years lived fairly close and they made it easier, making sure we got out of the house and spent time with them.

We were lucky but too many were not. When you are lonely, your mind takes over, and most of the time, not in a good way. Sad and lonely, you can end up telling yourself that no one wants you around. You look back at your life and all the times you felt like an outcast become stronger than the memories of when you felt as if you belonged somewhere. You may know you need help, but sooner or later you end up telling yourself you are not worth helping.

Then someone comes along to let you know you are worth their time and they offer you hope.

Let the redeemed of the Lord say so, whom he hath redeemed from the hand of the enemy

The enemy is no longer what caused PTSD, but it is PTSD trying to take over the rest of your life. When you have it, you feel like an outcast. Lost, hopeless and not worth helping, you give up on others because you gave up on yourself. The thing is, the others who have healed, know exactly what that feels like for you, because they went through it too. 

I was with Point Man International Ministries for years until I started to work with survivors from all causes. They are veterans and work with veterans and their families. Way back in 1984 they figured out that healing had to be done with treating the whole veteran. Their mind, their body and above all, their spirit, needed care. They knew this because they had suffered too. They were lost, lonely and felt like outcast too. Some had turned to drugs, alcohol, and some tried to end their own lives, but they were helped by others who knew exactly what it felt like on both sides of healing. They were there to show the way to get to the better side of it.

Alcoholics Anonymous Narcotics Anonymous work the same way...someone knows what it is like to be struggling alone, but they know what it was like when someone came along and helped them heal.

There are groups all over the country doing the work with other survivors and you can find them by just doing a Google search for PTSD, whatever caused yours, and spiritual support. The thing is, if you try one but find they are not a good match for what you believe, then find another group. Keep looking until you find one to fill your soul, not try to convert it.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Healing Rain
Michael W. Smith

Healing rain is coming down
It's coming nearer to this old town.
Rich and poor, weak and strong
It's bringing mercy, it won't be long.
Healing rain is coming down
It's coming closer to the lost and found.
Tears of joy and tears of shame
Are washed forever in Jesus' name.
Healing rain, it comes with fire
So let it fall and take us higher.
Healing rain, I'm not afraid
To be washed in Heaven's rain.
Lift your heads, let us return
To the mercy seat where time began.
And in your eyes I see the pain.
Come soak this dry heart with healing rain.
And only you, the Son of Man
Can take a leper and let him stand.
So lift your hands, they can be held
By someone greater, the Great I Am.
Healing rain, it comes with fire
So let it fall and take us higher.
Healing rain, I'm not afraid
To be washed in Heaven's rain.
To be washed in Heaven's rain.
Healing rain is falling down,
Healing rain is falling down,
I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid.
Healing rain is falling down,
Healing rain is falling down,
I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid.
Healing rain is falling down,
Healing rain is falling down,
I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid.
Healing rain is falling down,
Healing rain is falling down,
I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid.
Healing rain is falling down,
Healing rain is falling down,
I'm not afraid.
I'm not afraid.

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Martin Smith / Matthew Bronleewe / Michael Smith
Healing Rain lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc, BMG Rights Management

Michael W. Smith - Healing Rain (Official Music Video)

Saturday, May 22, 2021

GOP delivered message that cause of PTSD is no big deal

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 22, 2021

**Warning: If you want to consider this political instead of what it is, then you very well could be part of the problem people with PTSD have been dealing with.**


POLITICS EXTREMISM THE CAPITOL ATTACK WAS THE MOST DOCUMENTED CRIME IN HISTORY. WILL THAT ENSURE JUSTICE?
That is the headline on TIME.
To pierce the mass of people gathered there, each group member placed a hand on the back of the person ahead of them—a military-style tactic prosecutors called a “stack.” The group, clad in tactical vests, helmets and radios, forcibly entered through the Capitol rotunda doors, where James and Minuta followed 25 minutes later. “It’s going down, guys; it’s literally going down right now Patriots storming the Capitol building,” said Minuta, according to court documents. “F*cking war in the streets right now… word is they got in the building… let’s go.”

And now there are members of the GOP House and Senate claiming there was no violence and all the invaders were like regular tourists.

GOP efforts to downplay danger of Capitol riot increase, The Hill
Attempts to whitewash the violence of the Jan. 6 insurrection and cast the rioters as sympathetic characters are becoming increasingly common among Republican members of Congress.

Sen. Ron Johnson (R-Wis.) this week said it was a “false narrative” to say “there were thousands of armed insurrectionists breaching the Capitol,” while Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) said the rioters charged with crimes were facing overly harsh treatment in jail and questioned why Congress isn’t also investigating liberal protests over racial justice last year that at times turned violent.

Other Republicans in recent days have falsely claimed the rioters weren’t armed and questioned whether people in the mob were really former President Trump’s supporters. One GOP lawmaker compared one image of the Capitol breach to a “normal tourist visit.”
These lies send the message to everyone there that day and to all the people who watched in on TV, that this threat to their lives was no big deal!

If you want to know what it is like to face death that changes your life...consider the event all of us witnessed. The January 6th attack on the US Capitol.

NBC NewsHallie Jackson sat down with Rep. Dan Kildee, who took that familiar photo of officers with their guns drawn in the House chamber, for an exclusive interview where he opens up about his mental health struggles since the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol.
After The Attack, Slate, Christina Cauterucci wrote about what some of them went through that day and afterwards.
“It is hard to know who you can trust.” — Rep. Sara Jacobs
Rep. Grace Meng barricaded in a lounge at the Capitol on Jan. 6. Photo courtesy of Grace Meng
Eventually, the legislators got a text from staff members that the Capitol Police force was overwhelmed and wouldn’t be coming to save them. In that moment, Meng feared for her life. “Thank God we were fine afterward,” Frankel told me. “Physically fine—mentally, I don’t know,” she said with a laugh.
She’s also gotten calls from fellow members of Congress and their staffers, some of whom she barely knows, to check in on her after hearing what she’d gone through. “And I said, ‘I’m fine, I’m good now,’ ” Meng said. “And then they would just break down and cry, or they would just say to me, ‘I’m not OK.’ And some of these are grown men.”

Rep. Lois Frankel
For days after the ordeal, Frankel continued her work while battling extreme exhaustion, as her body and mind recovered from the stress of being trapped in a room with violent agitators outside. When we talked eight days after the attack, Frankel said it was the first day since the riot she hadn’t felt “totally wiped out.” Meng has noticed that she now feels “nervous” when she hears people she can’t see making loud noises outside the room she’s in. She’s also gotten calls from fellow members of Congress and their staffers, some of whom she barely knows, to check in on her after hearing what she’d gone through. “And I said, ‘I’m fine, I’m good now,’ ” Meng said. “And then they would just break down and cry, or they would just say to me, ‘I’m not OK.’ And some of these are grown men.”

Rep. Sara Jacobs
Jacobs had served in Congress all of three days before the insurrection. When the rioters breached the Capitol, she was in the House gallery—the balcony. The few dozen members of Congress and journalists who were up there with her were evacuated after those on the floor of the chamber, which meant a much closer brush with catastrophe. They were the ones photographed in those escape hoods and comforting one another while huddled on the ground. Some members were trapped in the gallery for 15 minutes or more, watching Capitol Police officers move furniture in front of the doors on the House floor, while other law enforcement officers outside the chamber struggled to clear a path through the rioters for their escape.

There are more but this is about Rep. Jason Crow, who was an Army Ranger.
On the Sunday after the riot, the congressional text chain moved to Zoom. Organized by Rep. Pramila Jayapal, D-Washington, members of Congress who had been in the gallery spent a couple of hours talking to one another and a trained counselor. Rep. Jason Crow, D-Colorado, a former Army Ranger who served three tours in Afghanistan and Iraq, was on the video chat. “What he has shared with all of us is that the surge of adrenaline that he had, and the fear that he faced—that we all experienced—was the same as combat,” Kuster said.

Since the siege, Crow has been vocal about this comparison. After a photo of him clutching the hand of Rep. Susan Wild, D-Pennsylvania, on the balcony floor made the rounds, Crow gave several interviews about going “into Ranger mode” in that moment of crisis. For Crow, that meant preparing for the possibility of having to fight off the rioters. He told me he double-checked the locks on the doors in the gallery and readied a pen as a makeshift weapon. He also considered asking one of the Capitol Police officers in the gallery to lend him a firearm—“You never know who’s capable of pulling the trigger until you’re put in that position … and I know that I am capable of doing that if necessary,” he said—but decided against it.

When he’s in Ranger mode, Crow said, “I just kind of box up my emotions and my feelings and put them aside.” But, eventually, those feelings come out. Crow says he’s been trying to harness the anger, anxiety, and fear prompted by the attack into action as Congress works to hold Donald Trump and his allies accountable for the attack. But the “hypervigilance” Crow remembers from his military service is back—even though it’s been 15 years since he felt it last. “I never thought the person I was then, and who I had to be as a combat leader, would ever come back and converge on my current life,” he said, noting that he’s had two children since leaving the Army. “But that is what happened. I had to tap back into that, and those two lives converged again.”
And now you know the message they are hearing from people they work with. Not only not worth investigating but not even worth their time to pay attention or care about their other members. It isn't just a matter of the threat still hanging over their heads, it is the approval of the GOP members who want to pretend it didn't happen for political reasons. 

I remember what it was like almost 40 years ago when I started working on PTSD and ended up having to deal with deluded individuals denying that PTSD was real. Nothing would get them open their eyes and see the truth. I often wonder how many people they ended up destroying in the process because of their ignorance. Lies make wounds deeper. 

When I hear elected officials lie about what happened, for political reasons, I am sickened because I know their lies cause more suffering. Not just to the other members, but to everyone in this entire country trying to recover from PTSD.

Without accountability and finding out exactly who was behind and involved in all of this, it can happen again. The thing that escapes most people is, the threat that the member of the House and Senate, know all too well it can, will prevent them from healing.

How do I know this? Because the threat to my life did not end in my life until my ex-husband died. There was no accountability for him. There was no closure for me until I got the obituary notice clipping from my cousin in the mail after I had moved over 1,300 miles and more than a decade after that.

For me, it was only one person. 

For members of the House and Senate, it was not just the people who invaded the Capitol seeking to harm and kill them. Oh no, it is now worse because other members they serve with are supporting what was done and attempting to dismiss it all as nothing to be addressed. The members of the Capitol Police Force are also dealing with that fact, knowing their lives don't matter enough for those they risk their lives for, do not even want to seek the truth for their sake.

If we do nothing but let it just happen to all of them, it will continue to cause more wounds. It is time for all of us to demand accountability and hold those who perpetrated this responsible.

To all the members of the House and Senate, their staffs, Capitol Police and workers, seek healing and know that most of the nation is behind you.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

We’re Not Gonna Take It
Twisted Sister

We're not gonna take it
Oh no, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore
We've got the right to choose it
There ain't no way we'll lose it
This is our life, this is our song
We'll fight the powers that be just
Don't pick our destiny 'cause
You don't know us, you don't belong
We're not gonna take it
Oh no, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore
Oh, you're so condescending
Your gall is never ending
We don't want nothin', not a thing from you
Your life is trite and jaded
Boring and confiscated
If that's your best, your best won't do
Sing it
We're right, yeah
We're free, yeah
We'll fight, yeah
You'll see
We're not gonna take it
No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore
We're not gonna take it
No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore
No way
Yeah
Sing it
We're right, yeah
We're free, yeah
We'll fight, yeah
You'll see
Sing it for me, Jersey
We're not gonna take it (come on)
No, we ain't gonna take it (louder)
We're not gonna take it anymore
We're not gonna take it
Oh no, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore
Sing it, sing it, sing
We're not gonna take it (louder)
No, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore
One more, one more, one more
We're not gonna take it (what)
No, we ain't gonna take it (yeah)
We're not gonna take it anymore
And don't you take it either

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Dee Snider
We’re Not Gonna Take It lyrics © Universal Tunes, Snidest Music Co.

Friday, May 21, 2021

Encourage healing #PTSD, not drinking

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 21, 2021

Did you know there is a difference between corruption and encouragement? Corruption is when you try to get someone to do something evil, wrong, bad for them or to go against what they believe. Encouragement is when you try to get someone to do something tat is good for them, something that will benefit them, especially when they want to give up.

If you have a friend dealing with PTSD, taking them out to a bar to drink their troubles away, is borderline corruption. Wanting them to get out of their isolation and off the couch, is a good thing but that is to where they should go to. Alcohol is a depressant and that is the last thing they need. It may make you feel more comfortable than taking them out for a cup of coffee and spend time with them that way, but this is supposed to be about them...not you.

More often than not, the person with PTSD survived something you may never understand and you may feel uncomfortable listing to them. It is way more uncomfortable if they lose their fight and end the battle by their own hands. Maybe they were the first or second person they called after it happened. You were there in the beginning but there before it. You know them. You'll be one of the first people to see the change in them but most of the time you don't know what it means. You won't until you spend time listening to them.

Do more listening than talking. Remember you are doing this for them. If you don't know what to say when they stop talking, then just put your arm on their shoulder, or nod your head. Don't look away from them or talk about something to fill up the quiet minutes. They may be struggling to find the right words or the courage to say what they need to.

This is why the featured video today is for King And Country, Fight On Fighter. Encouragement is a gift you give that can change a life for the better.
“Our chief want is someone who will inspire us to be what we know we could be.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson (Goodreads)


Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 
Fight On, Fighter
for KING And COUNTRY

I was there on the day that you were changed
You were scared and prepared for the heartbreak
Everything you knew faded out of view
Stole a piece of you
If I could, oh, I would be a hero
Be the one who would take all the arrows
Save you from the pain, carry all the weight
But I know that you're brave
Fight on, fighter
Don't let anyone steal your fire
Fight on, fighter
The Spirit is alive inside ya, yeah
There's a part that you hold that you lock down
Let it breathe, give it wings, set it free now
Time to make ya walk, break the prison bars
Show them who you are
Fight on, fighter
Don't let anyone steal your fire
Fight on, fighter
The Spirit is alive inside ya, yeah
Stronger than you than you ever thought
I know you're stronger
Braver than you were before
You know you're braver
Oh, no, you don't have to be afraid
Together we'll face it
So don't ever stop no matter what
'Cause you're gonna make it
Fight on, fighter
Don't let anyone steal your fire
Fight on, fighter
The Spirit is alive inside ya, yeah
Fight on, fighter

Don't let anyone steal your fire
Fight on, fighter
The Spirit is alive inside ya, yeah

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Ben Backus / Ben Glover / Joel David Smallbone / Luke Smallbone / Mark Campbell / Tedd Tjornhom Fight On, Fighter lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Mike Curb Music 

Thursday, May 20, 2021

Miracles don't come from nowhere

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 20, 2021

When you pray for something, and your prayers are answered, do you actually understand that God did it? Do you know how God answers prayers? He doesn't just snap His fingers to deliver it. He tries to use other people to give what you ask for. When it is something you need to do on your own, He does it by guiding you to find what you need to. If your prayers are not being answered, you may end up blaming God, when it was not His fault.

Have you ever thought about someone all of a sudden and had an urge to call them? If you do, you discover they needed someone to talk to. You were used to answer their prayers. How many times have you shrugged off the urge and found out something horrible happened to them, and you wished you had followed through on making the call?

Miracles happen all the time but most of the time we don't acknowledge them. We don't understand how God uses regular people all the time because they were willing to listen to Him and act on it. Somehow we end up claiming the miracle came out of nowhere.

The fact you have PTSD because you survived whatever caused PTSD to hit you, is a miracle itself. I've had over 10 of them. To me, it wasn't just surviving it, it was also the people who came to help me after it happened. It was holding onto my faith and letting it help heal me. It was the people who studied trauma and wrote about it long before I even knew it existed, and helped me understand it.

Over all these years, I've saved a lot of lives that you will never know about. It isn't my job to tell their stories or share anything I've done. It is, and was, my job to learn, understand, and be there to help them heal too. 

They prayed for help. I prayed to be of help to them. They followed being guided to me and I responded, or they read what I was guided to write. Their prayers were answered and so were mine.

The fact you found this site is a miracle itself because when I started on my older site, there were not many people doing this work. Now it is crowded and they managed to use social media to promote their sites. 

While I admit I am a bit jealous of them, the goal was to change the outcome and help people heal. I could overcome that jealousy because they are reaching more people than I ever could.

I remember what it was like when I just started to learn about all of this in 1982. I was lost and felt all alone. We didn't have computers back then, so I had to go to the library to learn. When I finally discovered that I was not alone, it was a miracle to me. Still the people who wrote the books I learned from will never know how much they helped me or the others I helped over the years, or the others they helped.

Is God asking you to deliver a miracle or leading you to find what you are looking for?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD 

Miracles Out Of Nowhere
Kansas

On a crystal morning I can see the dewdrops falling
Down from a gleaming heaven, I can hear the voices call
When you comin' home now, son, the world is not for you
Tell me what's your point of view
Hey there Mister Madman, what'cha know that I don't know
Tell me some crazy stories, let me know who runs this show
Glassy-eyed and laughing, he turns and walks away
Tell me what made you that way
Here I am just waiting for a sign
Asking questions, learning all the time
It's always here, it's always there
It's just love, and miracles out of nowhere
Tell me now dear mother, what's it like to be so old
Children grown and leavin', seems the world is growin' cold
And though your body's ailin' you
Your mind is just like new
Tell me where you're goin' to
Here I am just waiting for a sign
Asking questions, learning all the time
It's always here, it's always there
It's just love, and miralces out of nowhere
It's so simple right before your eyes
If you'll look through this disguise
It's always here, it's always there
It's just love and miracles out of nowhere
I sang this song a hundred, maybe a thousand years ago
No one ever listens, I just play and then I go
Off into the sunset like the western heroes do
Tell me what you're gonna do
Here I am, I'm sure to see a sign
All my life I knew that it was mine
It's always here, it's always there
It's just love and miracles out of nowhere

Flash Lyrics 

If you need to see them perform,,,,

Wednesday, May 19, 2021

The pep talk you need to give "you"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
May 19, 2021

When I was young, I was a jock...and a klutz. Never a good combination but I loved to do several things. My favorite was swimming. I swam a mile a night, then worked at the YMCA as a lifeguard. I remember listening to a swim coach giving his pep talk to the opposing team.

He looked every single one of them in the eye and said things to them, they ended up telling themselves.
If you have someone telling you they believe in you, then you end up believing in yourself. Isn't it time for you to start doing it because you do believe you can?

Tell yourself you can heal PTSD and then you'll find a way to do it. There is an abundance of resources online for you to find and in your own community. 

Listen to the video for today and then listen to the featured video by Des'ree You Got To Be.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

You Gotta Be
Des'ree 

Listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Lovers, they may cause you tears
Go ahead, release your fears
Stand up and be counted
Don't be ashamed to cry
You gotta be
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Herald what your mother said
Read the books your father read
Try to solve the puzzles in your own sweet time
Some may have more cash than you
Others take a different view
My oh my, eh, eh, eh
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Time asks no questions, it goes on without you
Leaving you behind if you can't stand the pace
The world keeps on spinning
Can't stop it if you tried to
The best part is danger staring you in the face, oh
Remember, listen as your day unfolds
Challenge what the future holds
Try and keep your head up to the sky
Lovers, they may cause you tears
Go ahead release your fears
My oh my, eh, eh, eh
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Yeah, yeah, yeah
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together
All I know, all I know, love will save the day
Yeah-yeah
Got to be bold
Got to be bad
Got to be wise
Do what others say
Got to be hard
Not too too hard
All I know is love will save the day
You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold, you gotta be wiser
You gotta be hard, you gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm, you gotta stay together

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Des'ree Weekes / Ashley Ingram
You Gotta Be lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd. 

"Can you imagine how I feel today?"

PTSD Patrol Kathie Costos June 15, 2021 "Can you imagine how I feel today?" is a question no one would have to ask if they talk...

PTSD Patrol

PTSD Patrol
It is your life, get in and drive it