Showing posts with label recovery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label recovery. Show all posts

Sunday, December 20, 2020

So what do you want someday soon?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 20, 2020

I haven't done a post in a while about veterans but this morning as I was searching for the song for the day, Someday Soon by Judy Collins came into my head. Once I listened to the lyrics, I remembered why.

This song came out during the Vietnam War. My husband listened to oldies, just like me and I remembered when I heard this song, I was thinking it could have been about us. No, he wasn't in the rodeo but as the years went by, my parents had a hard time accepting the fact that he did make me happy even though my heart was breaking.

Seeing him suffer from PTSD, and doing whatever I could to help him, broke my heart. Eventually, they started to tell me to get a divorce, even though my Dad was a veteran and spotted it in him the night they met. It was a tough road we were on, but looking back, it was a trip so worth taking.

"My parents can not stand him
Cause he rides the rodeo
My father says that
He will leave me crying
I would follow him right down
The toughest road I know
Someday soon, going with him
Someday soon"



So what do you want someday soon?

Some people want to go back to the way their lives were before the pandemic spread out across the world. They want to go out to eat, get together with family, friends and enjoy concerts, plays, parties and go out to the movie theaters. They hang onto hope that will all be possible again...someday soon.

Some people want to hit the lottery, so they play their numbers or buy their scratch tickets faithfully because they are sure it can happen to them. It gives them hope as they dream about what they'll do with the money....someday soon. 

For some with PTSD, your someday soon can be living a happier life and it can happen. It can happen if you are will to change what you can..and as the prayer from AA goes, wisdom to access the things you cannot change. What gives you hope about what can come with your someday soon?

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it.

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

Judy Collins Someday Soon
There's a young man that I know
His age is twenty-one
Comes from down
In southern Colorado
Just out of the service
And he's looking for his fun
Someday soon, going with him
Someday soon
My parents can not stand him
Cause he rides the rodeo
My father says that
He will leave me crying
I would follow him right down
The toughest road I know
Someday soon, going with him
Someday soon
And when he comes to call
My pa ain't got a good word to say
Guess it's cause he's just
As wild in the younger days
So blow, you old Blue Northern
Blow my love to me
He's driving in tonight
From California
He loves his damned old rodeo
As much as he loves me
Someday soon, going with him
Someday soon
But when he comes to call
My pa ain't got a word to say
Guess it's cause he's just
As wild in the younger days
Blow, you old Blue Northern
Blow my love to me
He's driving in tonight
From California
He loves his damned old rodeo
As much as he loves me
Someday soon, going with him
Someday soon
Someday soon, going with him
Someday soon

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Tyson Ian
Someday Soon lyrics © Four Strong Winds Ltd. 



Wednesday, December 16, 2020

Healing The Heart Scar

Healing The Heart Scar

by

Kathie Costos


It is time for you to realize

the pain is showing in your eyes.

It shouldn't come as a surprise

that you can't cover it up with lies.


Your heart has a huge scar

but it doesn't change who you are.

They say the truth shall set you free

so why don't you talk to me?


Yesterday does not get to win

if you take the first step to begin

to share with me your fears and pain

and fight this together again.


Your heart has a huge scar

but it doesn't change who you are.

They say the truth shall set you free

so why don't you talk to me?


I still see all that is good in you

and even though the things you do

to push me away

only make me more determined to stay.


Your heart has a huge scar

but it doesn't change who you are.

They say the truth shall set you free

so why don't you talk to me?


No one can change what happened before

but the future is an open door.

Only you can change what you do

to take back your life from the ghosts following you.


Your heart has a huge scar

but it doesn't change who you are.

They say the truth shall set you free

so why don't you talk to me?


You lived through something I may never understand

but I am still holding out my hand

waiting for you to take a chance with me

so that we can heal the pain that does not need to be.


Your heart has a huge scar

but it doesn't change who you are.

They say the truth shall set you free

so why don't you talk to me?


Surviving should not be a thing to grieve

when "All things are possible to those who believe"

and you will not longer try to hide

all the pain you feel inside.


Your heart has a huge scar

but it doesn't change who you are.

They say the truth shall set you free

so why don't you talk to me?



*** Mark 9:23***


Last night my husband was watching an Eagles concert and when I heard "I Can't Tell You Why" I went to bed remembering what it was like for me when I recognized the pain in my husband's eyes, because I had the same pain in mine.

I wrote Healing The Heart Scar this morning because sometimes the people who love the one with PTSD, have no idea how to tell them what they want to. I know, because as much as I understood about PTSD, I had a hard time talking to my husband in the beginning. 

If you love someone, show them the poem. It will let them know you do not blame them and you love them enough to want to help them.

If you are the one suffering and don't know how to ask for help, then have them listen to the song from the Eagles. It will open the door to having a heart to heart talk. Most of the time they have no idea what is going on with you but they see the changes as much as they see the pain in your eyes.


Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it.

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD



Eagles 1979 I Can't Tell You Why

Look at us baby, up all night
Tearing our love apart
Aren't we the same two people who live
Through years in the dark?
Ahh
Every time I try to walk away
Something makes me turn around and stay
And I can't tell you why
When we get crazy
It just ain't to right (try to keep you head little girl)
Girl I get lonely too
You don't have to worry
Just hold on tight (don't get caught in your little world)
Cause I love you
Nothing's wrong as far as I can see
We make it harder than it has to be
And I can't tell you why
No, baby, I can't tell you why
I can't tell you why
Every time I try to walk awayv Something makes me turn around and stay
And I can't tell you why
No, no, baby, I can't tell you why
I can't tell you why
I can't tell you why

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Don Henley / Timothy B. Schmit / Glenn Lewis Frey
I Can't Tell You Why lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc, Eb Music Services 

Sunday, December 13, 2020

HANG ON! These thing take time.

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 13, 2020

HANG ON! These thing take time. Those are part of the lyrics from Needtobreathe's Hang On, and that is a message you need to reminded of when you are trying to heal PTSD, even though the song is not about PTSD.

It took time for everyone who ever healed and it will take time for you. It takes leaps of opened eyed faith to know that you can change how things are for you. You have to learn a way of healing that will take care of all the parts of you...your mind, your body and your spirit.

Things take time, so you also need patience with yourself and others. It took time for PTSD to change you and it will take time to change again. It takes time for you to understand, and it will take time for those around you to understand too. 

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it. 

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD



"Hang On"
First touch of summer, she's got your t-shirt on
Sun's going down, schools out, stars are coming on
You can rewind it, but you can't ever feel like you do tonight
Make a movie in your mind, but don't rush it
Boy, you're about to see the light

Hang on to the light in your eyes and the feeling
Hang on to your love drunk original reason
Hang on to the small town you love but you're leaving
Oh you won't be a fool for so long
So hang on 
If you listen to the voices inside they won't do you wrong
You can look back over your shoulder, yeah, but don't look too long
It takes time to realize
That your life's gonna pass you by

So hang on to the light in your eyes and the feeling
Hang on to your love drunk original reason
So hang on to the small town you love but you're leaving
'Cause you won't be a fool for so long

Oh, these things they take time
And all these things take time, these things they take time
And all these things I've learned, it's never a straight line
'Cause all these things take time, these things they take time

So hang on to the light in your eyes and the feeling
Hang on to your love drunk original reason
'Cause all these things take time, these things they take time
And all these things I've learned, it's never a straight line

So hang on to the light in your eyes and the feeling
So hang on to your love drunk original reason
So hang on to the small town you love but you're leaving
Oh you won't be a fool for so long
So hang on

(All these things they take time)
Hang on
(All these things they take time)
Hang on
(All these things they take time)

(AZ Lyrics) 

bonus song
Who Am I

White lights and desperation
Hard times and conversation
No one should ever love me like you do
Sometimes my bad decisions
Define my false suspicions
No one should ever love me like you do
While I'm on this road you take my hand
Somehow you really love who I really am
I push you away, still you won't let go
You grow your roses on my barren soul
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
Last night, confidence was shaken
My wounds and my past was saying
No one should ever love me like you do
While I'm on this road you take my hand
Somehow you really love who I really am
I push you away, still you won't let go
You grow your roses on my barren soul
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
The way I push you through it, what you had to see
I'm a train wreck, I'm a mess, you see the best
And the worst in me
Still I can't imagine that I've learned your trust
I don't understand where your love comes from
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you
Who am I, who am I, who am I
To be loved by you

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Nathaniel Rinehart / William Rinehart
Who Am I lyrics © Downtown Music Publishing 

Saturday, December 12, 2020

PTSD Patrol Superstition ain't the way

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 12, 2020

Do you still believe something that you don't understand? If you don't understand PTSD, then you probably believe a lot of things that are not true.




When people believe in lies, they either trust the person they heard it from...or they want to believe it, and then they suffer.

If you have PTSD, you are not mentally weak, not defective, not stuck that way, and not being punished by God. It means you survived something the others don't understand.

If you haven't learned what it is by now, that is your fault but there is a remedy for that and it is fixed by doing some basic research.

If you finally stopped denying you have PTSD and sought help, but the treatment didn't work, that does not mean you are untreatable. That is why there are so many different types of treatment.

If you went on medication that made you feel worse or you couldn't tolerate the side effects, that doesn't mean that you a beyond help. That is why there are many different medications and combinations.

If you went to a support group that didn't help, that doesn't mean you don't belong in a group, it just means you were in the wrong one. That is why there are many different groups out there.

These things are all there after over 40 years because they work! Keep looking for the one that works for  you and stop believing nonsense!

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it!

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD

1. "So many people have had it worse than I did. I shouldn't be complaining."
2. "My trauma defines me. It affects everything I think, feel, and do."
3. "I don't have PTSD, so what happened couldn't have been that bad."
4. "They told me this therapy would be effective for PTSD, but it didn't help me at all. There must be something wrong with me."
5. "Getting over it is too hard. I'll be stuck like this forever."

Why do people knock on wood for luck?
In many cultures, it’s a common superstition for people to knock their knuckles on a piece of wood to bring themselves good fortune or ward off bad luck. Yet while the phrase “knock on wood”—or “touch wood” in Britain—has been part of the vernacular since at the least the 19th century, there seems to be little agreement on how it originated. One common explanation traces the phenomenon to ancient pagan cultures such as the Celts, who believed that spirits and gods resided in trees. Knocking on tree trunks may have served to rouse the spirits and call on their protection, but it could have also been a way of showing gratitude for a stroke of good luck. Yet another theory is that people knocked on wood to chase away evil spirits or prevent them from listening in when they boasted about their luck, thereby preventing a reversal of fortune. Christians, meanwhile, have often linked the practice to the wood of the cross from Christ’s crucifixion.

Very superstitious,
Writing's on the wall,
Very superstitious,
Ladders bout' to fall,
Thirteen month old baby,
Broke the lookin' glass
Seven years of bad luck,
The good things in your past
When you believe in things
That you don't understand,
Then you suffer,
Superstition aint the way
Hey
Very superstitious,
Wash your face and hands,
Rid me of the problem,
Do all that you can,
Keep me in a daydream,
Keep me goin' strong,
You don't wanna save me,
Sad is the soul
When you believe in things
That you don't understand,
Then you suffer,
Superstition ain't the way,
Yeh, yeh
Very superstitious,
Nothin' more to say,
Very superstitious,
The devil's on his way,
Thirteen month old baby,
Broke the lookin' glass,
Seven years of bad luck,
Good things in your past
When you believe in things
That you don't understand,
Then you suffer,
Superstition ain't the way,
No, no, no

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Stevie Wonder
Superstition lyrics © Jobete Music Co., Inc. 

Thursday, December 10, 2020

Let The Sun Shine In

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 10, 2020

Worlds align this winter solstice: Look for Jupiter, Saturn in December skies
“Alignments between these two planets are rather rare, occurring once every 20 years or so, but this conjunction is exceptionally rare because of how close the planets will appear to one another,” Hartigan said.

“You’d have to go all the way back to just before dawn on March 4, 1226, to see a closer alignment between these objects visible in the night sky.”

Astronomers call what we'll witness on Dec. 21 a "conjunction." From asteroids or moons to planets and stars, a conjunction is when two objects in space appear to be close to each other as observed from Earth. In the reality of space, they're still hundreds of millions of miles apart.

Ever since I read that Jupiter and Saturn were going to align, I keep thinking about the 5th Dimension and Aquarius. In the song it is Jupiter and Mars but there is a part of the song that talks about friends walking away. 

If your friends walked away, they were not really your friends. Safe bet, if it you noticed one of your friends struggling with something, you'd ask them what is going on...let them know you were ready to listen and then offer to help them.

Struggling to heal PTSD can suck. It can feel as if you are doing it all alone. That is why you need to find a support group so you can be with people like you. Then you can not just find support and comfort, you can deliver it to them as well.

Let this next year be a new beginning for you when you let the sun shine in to replace the darkness you have been living with.

Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it.

#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD





Aquarius / Let the Sunshine In
The 5th Dimension 

When the moon is in the Seventh House
And Jupiter aligns with Mars

Then peace will guide the planets
And love will steer the stars
This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius
Age of Aquarius
Aquarius
Aquarius
Harmony and understanding
Sympathy and trust abounding
No more falsehoods or derisions
Golden living dreams of visions
Mystic crystal revelation
And the mind's true liberation
Aquarius
Aquarius
When the moon is in the Seventh House
And Jupiter aligns with Mars
Then peace will guide the planets
And love will steer the stars
This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius
Age of Aquarius
Aquarius
Aquarius
Aquarius
Aquarius
Let the sunshine, let the sunshine in, the sunshine in
Let the sunshine, let the sunshine in, the sunshine in
Let the sunshine, let the sunshine in, the sunshine in
Oh, let it shine, c'mon
Now everybody just sing along
Let the sun shine in
Open up your heart and let it shine on in
When you are lonely, let it shine on
Got to open up your heart and let it shine on in
And when you feel like you've been mistreated
And your friends turn away
Just open your heart, and shine it on in

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: James Rado / Gerome Ragni / Galt Mac Dermot
Aquarius / Let the Sunshine In (The Flesh Failures) lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC 

Wednesday, December 9, 2020

"Your demons come to light and your mind is not your own"

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 9, 2020

"Your demons come to light and your mind is not your own" but it doesn't have to be that way. PTSD demons are only trying to finish the job on you after you survived whatever caused them to invade your life.

They try to take over your days, but you get busy, ignore them as much as you can, but there is a price to pay for that. 

Demons get stronger and wiggle their way into every relationship you have. That is why a lot of Vietnam veterans reported reaching retirement age and ended up shocked they suddenly got hit by PTSD. They didn't notice how their many marriages fell apart because it was easier to just blame the line of ex-wives they left behind and kids who stopped talking to them. As for sleep, turns out they were passing out instead of falling asleep. The nightmares came but they stuffed them so they could ignore them the same way they ignored everything else during the day.

Your life doesn't have to be that way. When you start to heal, the demons lose power over your life. They stop being able to penetrate every part of you and you #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD so that you are able to enjoy your life again.

Much better than letting the demons control you and it is time YOU GOT TO WIN!

Remember, it is your life....get in and drive it!




Lonely is the night when you find yourself alone
Your demons come to light and your mind is not your own
Lonely is the night when there's no one left to call
You feel the time is right, say the writing's on the wall
It's a high time to fight when the walls are closin' in
Call it what you like it's time you got to win
Lonely, lonely, lonely your spirit's sinkin' down
You find you're not the only stranger in this town
Red lights, green lights, stop and go jive
Headlines, deadlines jammin' your mind
You been stealin' shots from the side
Let your feeling's go for a ride
There's danger out tonight, the man is on the prowl
Get the dynamite, the boys are set to howl
Lonely is the night when you hear the voices call
Are you ready for a fight, do you wanna take it all?
Slowdown, showdown waitin' on line
Show time, no time for changin' your mind
Streets are ringin', march to the sound
Let your secrets follow you down
Somebody's watchin' you baby, so much you can do
Nobody's stoppin' you baby, from makin' it too
One glimpse'll show you now baby, what the music can do
One kiss'll show you now baby, it can happen to you
No more sleepin', wastin' our time
Midnight creepin's, first on our minds
No more lazin' 'round the TV
You'll go crazy, come out with me
Feelin' lonely
Lonely is the night
Feelin' lonely
Lonely is the night
Lonely, lonely, lonely

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: William H Squier
Lonely is the Night lyrics © Spirit Music Group 

Tuesday, December 8, 2020

PTSD Patrol Undefeated

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 8, 2020

There seems to be some confusion on spiritual healing. It is not a matter of going to church or thinking that you are supposed to be "sinless" or perfect.

If you read the Bible at all, you'll know that it is full of a people who screwed up in their lives and yet God used them to make miracles happen.

The fact that you survived something that could have killed you, is a miracle in itself, but too many think it is punishment for something you did wrong...and God sent it to you. How do you pray or talk to God if you think He did it to you? You can't but you can turn to Him once you understand that is not the way it happened.

Every heartache, every doubt you ever had, was something that Jesus knew all too well. He also knew what it was like to be betrayed by those you trusted. To do the right thing and then have people turn away from you, as much as He understood what it was like to feel abandoned by God.

Even as the Son of God, He still asked for help from other people. What makes you so different that you think you shouldn't ask for help too, especially if PTSD hit you because of your job?

It doesn't matter if you screwed up in your life, you can start making a miracle in your own life so you can turn around and begin one in the life of someone else.


Ephesians 6:10-18 New International Version
The Armor of God
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.
So if you think you cannot talk to someone here on earth, then talk to Him.  He doesn't want to hear words you read out a book or just repeat something that is not from your heart. He can actually hear what is in your heart, so speak to Him from there and tell Him you are turning to Him for help.


Incubus - Undefeated 

Could there be another universe?
One that wasn't always out to getcha?
And it breaks my heart a little bit
That here I'm like a sleepwalker
Half alive and hanging by a thread
I'm not dead yet
I'm not dead yet, no
I'm bent but not broken
And I'm not dead yet, no
Yeah
Maybe there's a poem in reverse
Spoken and it holds me out forever
Man it breaks my heart a little bit
But love is like a blind archer
Tryin' to shoot an apple off my head
I'm not dead yet
I'm not dead yet, no
I'm bent but not broken
And I'm not dead yet
Not yet
We're undefeated, bent but not broken
No they ain't seen nothing yet
We're undefeated, bent but not broken
Not dead yet
We're undefeated, bent but not broken
No they ain't seen nothing yet
We're undefeated, bent but not broken
I'm not dead yet
I'm not dead yet, no
I'm bent but not broken
And I'm not dead yet (ooh)
I'm not dead yet (ooh)
I'm not dead yet (ooh)
I'm bent but not broken (ooh)
And I'm not dead yet (ooh)
No

Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Brandon Boyd / Michael Einziger / Christopher Kilmore / Benjamin Kenney / Jose Pasillas
Undefeated lyrics © Hunglikeyora Music 

Sunday, December 6, 2020

I Am Broken Too!

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 6, 2020

I am so pissed off right now my head is ready to explode! This is not going to be one of those cheery post with a chair dancing song, I picked I Am Broken Too by Killswich Engage for this reason.

I was on Facebook and a veteran friend of mine I've known for decades, posted about "22 veterans committing suicide today" and I flipped out! After 38 years of posting, tracking, treating veterans spiritually, educating and advocating, it meant nothing! Over 500 videos on YouTube, 3 books and way too many posts to count on Wounded Times along with my older sites and I had to read something like this from someone I know? WTF!

If you need help, veteran, family member or anyone dealing with PTSD, I know what it is like to feel lost and alone. I know what PTSD does as a survivor of over 10 events. What it was like for my veteran husband and what it was like for the veterans whose lives I saved! Above all, I know what it is like to need help and NOT FIND IT! So yes, I've been broken, beaten down and still willing to do the best I can everyday because this is something that is in my DNA after all these years.

If you need help, email me woundedtimes@aol.com or call me 407-754-7526. Read the posts on PTSD Patrol and Wounded Times.


You carry this weight trying to cover your mistakes
To make it seem like nothing could ever break you
But I see right through, 'cause I am broken too
In all the same places as you
And if you needed proof, I'll reopen my wounds
Reopen my wounds, yeah
I see myself in you (in you)
I know you can make it through
If you needed proof, I'll reopen my wounds
In all the right places for you
So now you see the truth that you are broken too
I'll reopen my wounds for you
I keep making the same mistakes, just to feel alive again
It's the only way to break on through
So stop numbing all the pain
'Cause it just won't go away (won't go away)
If you only knew how much I needed you
And if you needed proof, I'll reopen my wounds (my wounds)
In all the right places for you
I can see the truth 'cause I am broken too
I am broken too (broken just like you)

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Adam Dutkiewicz / Jesse Leach / Joel Stroetzel / Justin Foley / Mike D'Antonio
I Am Broken Too lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd. 

Saturday, December 5, 2020

Roll With It

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 4, 2020

Today the view from the PTSD Patrol garage is a little different because it is snowing and I wanted to let you see it instead of just looking at my face and messy garage.

In case you don't know why I do these videos from the garage, it is because PTSD Patrol is all about helping people understand the vehicle they live in, as much as they understand the one they drive.

You decide when to drive, how fast you go and where you want to go to. You may not understand how that vehicle works, but you know enough to get you from one place to another. You don't have to totally understand PTSD to be able to do the same in your life. All you need is a basic understanding so you realize the power you do have over it.

The only limit is the one you allow. 

If you have been working on healing, there is a time to just rest and "roll with it" and that is why the feature video is Steve Winwood, Roll With It.
"When life is too much
Roll with it, baby
Don't stop and lose your touch
Oh no, baby
Hard times knocking on your door
I'll tell them you ain't there no more
Get on through it
Roll with it, baby"
Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it....most of the time but there is a time to just relax!
#BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD
 

When life is too much
Roll with it, baby
Don't stop and lose your touch
Oh no, baby
Hard times knocking on your door
I'll tell them you ain't there no more
Get on through it
Roll with it, baby
Luck will come and then slip away
You've gotta move bring it back to stay
You just roll with it, baby
Come on and just roll with it, baby
You and me
Roll with it, baby
Hang on and just roll with it, baby
Hey
The way that you love is good as money
I swear by stars above sweet as honey
People think you're down and out
You show them what it's all about
You can make it
Roll with it, baby
When this world turns its back on you
Hang in and do that sweet thing you do
You just roll with it, baby
Hey-hey
You just roll with it, baby
Come on and just roll with it, baby
You and me
Just roll with it, baby
Roll with it, baby
Hey-hey
You just roll with it, baby
You and me
Just roll with it, baby
Hang on and just roll with it, baby
Hey
Now there'll be a day
You'll get there, baby
You'll hear the music play
You'll dance, baby
You'll leave bad times way behind
Nothing but good times on your mind
You can do it
Roll with it, baby
Then you'll see life will be so nice
It's just a step up to paradise
Just roll with it, baby
Hey-hey
You just roll with it, baby
You and me
Just roll with it, baby
Hang on and just roll with it, baby
Hey-hey
Come on
Roll with me, baby
Hang on, baby
Come on
Roll with me, baby......


Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Will Jennings / Steve Winwood
Roll With It lyrics © F.s. Music Ltd., Blue Sky Rider Songs, Emi Music Publishing France, F S Music Ltd, Warner-tamerlane Pub. O/b/o F.s. Music Ltd., Irving Music, Inc. O/b/o Blue Sky Rider Songs, Stone Agate Music Corp

Thursday, December 3, 2020

PTSD in COVID spreader survivors

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 3, 2020

There are a lot of people recovering from COVID-19, and some will carry the lingering effects of it for many years. While most people are doing whatever they can to protect themselves and their families, there are many more, who have been made to believe it isn't real. How do they deal with that after it is too late to prevent getting it and spreading it? How do they live with that guilt? They do the right thing and speak out to wake other people up so they can begin to heal their souls.

If you think that there are no emotional/spiritual prices being paid at the same time there are physical ones, consider this from Hartford Healthcare.
Even once physically recovered, these people may experience lingering effects due to:
A fear of dying.
Social isolation from the time spent hospitalized or in quarantine.
Anxiety at the thought of getting sick again.
Guilt over infecting or harming others.

PTSD, long associated with deployed members of the military or those who have endured extreme trauma and violence, is anticipated to be a challenging aftereffects of the lingering pandemic and even trigger a mental health crisis, according to Patricia Rehmer, president of the Behavioral Health Network and vice president of Hartford HealthCare.  
Signs that PTSD may be affecting you can include:
Overwhelming sadness, fear or anger.
Having flashbacks or nightmares.
Feeling detached from your life and loved ones.
Avoiding memories of the illness.

30-year-old dies after attending 'COVID party' thinking virus was a 'hoax'The man told nurses, "I think I made a mistake." 

“Before I contracted it I thought, ‘It’s just made up, it’s all fabricated’,” Mata told NBC News “Global Hangout” this week, adding that he figured his six-day-a-week gym habit and healthy eating regimen would spare him even if it did exist. “That’s what prevented me from getting help sooner, when it went really bad.” “The bubble I was in online made me think it didn’t add up. To think that I went down that rabbit hole, it’s embarrassing.” Tony Green
From the BBC

Man who believed virus was hoax loses wife to Covid-19


"Many people still think that the Coronavirus is a fake crisis which at one time I did too and not that I thought it wasn't a real virus going around but at one time I felt that it was blown out of proportion and it wasn't that serious. We kept on watching the news and kept on hearing about the spreading of the Coronavirus and to be honest I didn't really think nothing of it I still thought it was being blown out of proportion until about 4 and 1/2 weeks ago when I started to feel sick and once I started to feel sick I stopped working and stayed home yes I came down with the Coronavirus and a couple days later after I started to not feel good my wife started to not feel good and we stayed at home quarantined and my wife did go to the hospital to get tested and they told her yeah you probably have the coronavirus so go home and quarantine yourself well a few days went by and we both started feeling worse and worse and worse to the point where we barely had any energy left to do anything and all we want to do is sleep. So three weeks ago Sunday we decided not to play around with this anymore and I had just enough energy to drive us to the hospital Palm Beach Gardens Medical Center and we both got confirmed that we had the Coronavirus. They admitted us right away and we both went to ICU. I started feeling better within a few days but my wife got worse to the point where they sedated her and put her on the ventilator. I was never put ventilator and started feeling better feeling stronger never had terrible aches and pains just weak and exhausted. Even now I am feeling better A lot better then a few weeks ago I still have covid-19 and some pneumonia in my lungs and we've been here 3 weeks as of yesterday. As of today my wife is still sedated and on the ventilator with no signs of improving. There were a couple times were they tried to start weaning her off the ventilator but as soon as they've done that her oxygen level dropped and they had to put her back on the ventilator full time. My wife has been sick before in the past quite a few times and she always fought through to get better but now after 3 weeks I have come to accept that my wife may pass away and the peace I have about it is that I know without a shadow of a doubt that she will be going home to be with the Lord but I also do believe in miracles and I'm holding on to the chance that she may get healed but if not I am thankful for her I know we've been married for 8 years. So think about what I wrote and think about if this thing is a fake crisis. This Coronavirus affects people differently. My wife has suffered from different physical ailments which she has overcome before but she sure is struggling and the doctors have said they have had a tough time on getting her better. This thing is nothing to be messed with please listen to the authorities and heed the advice of the experts. We don't have to fear this and by heeding the advice doesn't mean that you fear it that means you're showing wisdom during this epidemic time. Looking back I should have wore a mask in the beginning but I didn't and perhaps I'm paying the price for it now but I know that if it was me that gave it to my wife I know that she forgives me and I know that God forgives me. Whether man forgives me or not that's out of my control but as long as I have the assurance that God forgives me and my wife forgives me I am good. So just think about what I said and if you have to go out please use wisdom and don't be foolish like I was so the same so the same thing won't happen to you like it happened to me and my wife."
and then came the realization, it would get worse.
Brian told BBC News that he "wished [he'd] listened from the beginning" and hoped his wife would forgive him.

"This is a real virus that affects people differently. I can't change the past. I can only live in today and make better choices for the future," Brian explained.


"She's no longer suffering, but in peace. I go through times missing her, but I know she's in a better place."





If you were among those who believed liars and did not protect yourself, your family or others in your community, you may have guilt ontop of everything else that COVID-19 did. You need to forgive yourself. Asking God for forgiveness is only part of it because if you do nothing to stop others from spreading the plague then are you doing anything to deserve being forgiven? Right now, there are far too many people who need to hear the painful truth so they have a chance to avoid going through what you did. The people in the articles above are doing what they can to save lives.

Doctors and nurses who put their lives ont the line to take care of them only ask one thing in return...that is wear a mask and stop spreading the germs that will kill people. The vaccine will come lomg after far too many more die.

Time to "come out of the dark" and forgive yourself, and those who lied to you. They were lied to by someone else they believed. Tell them the truth and what they do with it, is up to them. It is out of your control, but you can put your mind at ease knowing you did everything possible to tell the truth. 

Remember, it is your life...get in an drive it! #BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD.

Wednesday, December 2, 2020

The pains of Christmas?

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
December 2, 2020

Well, it is the Christmas season again. Most people want the Norman Rockwell kind of Christmas. They are out buying gifts, decorations and mailing out Christmas cards. Some do it because they actually enjoy it but others think they have to.

This year, things are not 'normal" as more people are struggling to just feed their families, keep a roof over their heads and survive during a pandemic that was allowed to get totally out of control. Knowing things could have been different, makes the suffering worse.

As hard as this year is, this is the worst season if you have PTSD. You're already depressed and lonely! You didn't need any of the extra burdens on your shoulders.
You may be asking if there is anything you can do about it and yes you can! Look at what this holiday is supposed to be all about. It is the season of love and miracles. You can actually give yourself a gift this year, that will end up being one for those you love all year around....healing!

What better way of showing how much they mean to you than to be the best person you can be? Then stop doing things because you think you have to, buying gifts you cannot afford...and all the other traditional crap that you really don't want to do. Do what will really come from your heart and live a better life!

Remember, it is your your life...get in and drive it! #BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife

The Twelve Pains of Christmas
Bob Rivers

The first thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Is finding a Christmas tree
The second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The third thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The fourth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Sending Christmas cards
Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The fifth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Five months of bills
Sending Christmas cards
Hangovers
Rigging up the lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The sixth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Facing my in-laws
Five months of bills
"I hate those Christmas cards!"
Hangovers
Rigging up these lights
And finding a Christmas tree
The seventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Salvation Army
Facing my in-laws
Five months of bills
Sending Christmas cards
"Aw geez"
"I'm trying to rig up these lights!"
And finding a Christmas tree
The eighth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
"I want ant farmer for Christmas"
"Charities, and what do you mean your inlaws?"
Five months of bills
"Ah, mailing out these cards!"
"Edith, get me a beer, huh!"
"What, we have no extension chord?!?"
And finding a Christmas tree
The ninth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Finding parking spaces
"Daddy, I want some candy!"
"Donations!"
Facing my in-laws
Five months of bills
"Writing up those Christmas cards"
Hangovers
"Now why the hell are they blinking?"
And finding a Christmas tree
The tenth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Batteries not included
No parking spaces
"Buy me something!"
"Get a job ya bum!"
Facing the inlaws
Five months of bills
"Yo ho, sending Christmas cards"
"Ah geez, look at this!"
"One light goes out, they all go out!"
And finding a Christmas tree
The eleventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Stale TV specials
Batteries not included
No parking spaces
"I gotta go to the bathroom"
Charities
"She's a witch, I hate her!"
Five months of bills
"Oh, I don't even know half these people!"
"Who's got the toilet paper?"
"Get a flashlight, I blew a fuse!"
And finding a Christmas tree
The twelfth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
Singing Christmas Carols
Stale TV specials
Batteries not included
No parking
"Waaah!"
Charities
Gotta make 'em dinner
Five months of bills
"I'm not sending them, Mister, that's it!"
"Shut up, you!"
"Fine, you're so smart, you rig up the lights!"
And finding a Christmas tree

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Bob Rivers / Brian Silva / Brian Anthony Silva / Dennis J Amero
The Twelve Pains of Christmas lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC 

Sunday, November 29, 2020

Letting music help you Drift Away

PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
November 29, 2020


Oh, give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Beginning to think that I'm wastin' time
I don't understand the things I do
The world outside looks so unkind
So I'm countin' on you to carry me through
If you haven't guessed by now, the feature video on PTSD Patrol is Dobie Gray Drift Away.

Hopefully by now, with all the music being shared, you've noticed how you mood does change, even if it is just for a little while. This is why music therapy works on PTSD. It takes your mind away from your problems and helps to teach your body to calm down again.

This is one of the best songs to explain that.
Remember, it is your life...get in and drive it. #BreakTheSilence and #TakeBackYourLife from #PTSD



Day after day I'm more confused
Yet I look for the light in the pouring rain
You know that's a game that I hate to lose
I'm feelin' the strain, ain't it a shame
Oh, give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Oh, give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Beginning to think that I'm wastin' time
I don't understand the things I do
The world outside looks so unkind
So I'm countin' on you to carry me through
Oh, give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
And when my mind is free
You know a melody can move me
And when I'm feelin' blue
The guitar's comin' through to soothe me
Thanks for the joy that you've given me
I want you to know I believe in your song
Rhythm and rhyme and harmony
You help me along makin' me strong
Oh, give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Oh, give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Hey, hey, give me the beat boys, and free my soul
I want to get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Na na na, won't ya, won't ya take me
Oh oh, take me
Won't find
Early in the morning, they wanna take me
Come on and free my soul na na and drift away

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Mentor R. Williams
Drift Away lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group 

Friday, November 27, 2020

PTSD does not mean you are broken

Wounded Times and PTSD Patrol
Kathie Costos
November 27, 2020

Today I noticed that Wounded Times is still getting about 1,000 hits a day after months of not posting on it. That tells me the need to find this work, is still there. While I have been focusing on everyone with PTSD since June, I keep getting reminders that our veterans are not getting what they need to heal. One more reminder came Tuesday when I received a phone call from someone working with veterans. 

As we were talking, the sadness took over because he was having a hard time facing the fact that his work was hard to find too. So much nonsense out there getting in the way of what works, and what can change lives, more and more people are giving up. We're not! We are not giving up because as heartbreaking as it is to know how much suffering there is out there, the feeling we get when lives are changed, is so worth whatever price we have to pay with our own emotions.

I know first hand that life can change for the better. My husband knows that. All the veterans I've worked with over all these years, know that. I just wish everyone knew that.

So today, the daily video on PTSD Patrol is featuring Jon Bon Jovi Unbroken. If you are a veteran, you are not broken and you are not the problem. If you are a person trying to heal PTSD, you are not broken either. No one is really broken, a little dented, OK, but not broken.



I was born to be of service
Basic training felt like home
I had honor, I found purpose
Sir, yes, sir, that's what I know
They sent us to a place
I'd never heard of weeks before
When you're 19, it ain't hard to sleep
In the desert on God's floor
Close your eyes, stop counting sheep
You ain't in prison anymore
We were taught to shoot our rifles
Men and women side by side
Thought we'd be met as liberators
In a thousand-year-old fight
I got this painful ringing in my ear
From an IED last night
But no lead-lined Humvee war machine
Could save my sergeant's life
Three more soldiers, six civilians
Need these words to come out right
God of mercy, God of light
Save your children from this life
Hear these words, this humble plea
For I have seen the suffering
And with this prayer I'm hoping
That we can be unbroken
It's eighteen months now I've been back now
With this medal on my chest
But there are things I can't remember
And there are things I won't forget
I lie awake at night
With dreams the devil shouldn't see
I wanna scream but I can't breathe
And, Christ, I'm sweating through these sheets
Where's my brothers? Where's my country?
Where's my how-things-used-to-be?
God of mercy, God of light
Save your children from this life
Hear these words, this humble plea
For I have seen the suffering
And with this prayer I'm hoping
That we can be unbroken
My service dog's done more for me
Than the medication would
There ain't no angel that's coming to save me
But even if they could
Today twenty-two will die from suicide
Just like yesterday, they're gone
I live my life for each tomorrow
So their memories will live on
Once we were boys and we were strangers
Now we're brothers and we're men
Someday you'll ask me "Was it worth it
To be of service in the end?"
Well, the blessing and the curse is
Yeah, I'll do it all again

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Jon Bon Jovi
Unbroken lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group 

Wednesday, November 25, 2020

PTSD Patrol Do You Want To Stay Together?

PTSD Patrol 
Kathie Costos 
November 25, 2020

Today the video is up early make up for yesterday. My husband had minor surgery and was supposed to come home but they decided to keep him overnight. This morning when I was driving to pick him up, I heard a song on the radio and started to chair dance. 

It got me thinking about all the things we've been through and how glad I was that I decided to stay with him when things were not so good. The way I see it, I knew him when things were better. I knew his character and his heart. I knew he'd be worth whatever I needed to do to help him be happier.

The song is Al Green's Let's Stay Together.

This is for anyone who loves someone with PTSD. You need to figure out if you want to stay together in bad times as well as the good. Having PTSD isn't easy on them. It is hard on you, but especially hard on them since they lose hope as they see you pulling away from them. When they need you the most, they push you away so that you won't see how much pain they are in. That may not make sense to you, but there isn't much that does make sense when they are living on a rollercoaster with their emotions all over the place.

They feel the don't deserve anything one moment and the next, they are entitled to everything. They have overblown reactions to simple things and paranoia starts to take over too. They try to hide their pain so that you don't feel sorry for them or think they are crazy, and that leaves you not knowing what it going on.

There is no way we could have stayed together all these years if I didn't have a full understanding of what PTSD was and knew that things could get better with a lot of work and a lot of patience. Faith, well, needless to say, played a huge part in keeping me together too.

Listen to the lyrics and then ask yourself, do you want to stay together or walk away? My guess is that you love them enough to fight for them, the same way you'd hope they'd fight for you if you were the survivor who needed them!



"Let's Stay Together" 

Let's stay together 
I'm, I'm so in love with you
Whatever you want to do
Is alright with me
'Cause you make me feel so brand new
And I want to spend my life with you 
 Let me say that since, baby
Since we've been together
Loving you forever
Is what I need
Let me be the one you come running to
I'll never be untrue 

Oh, baby, let's, let's stay together
Loving you whether, whether
Times are good or bad, happy or sad


Whether times are good or bad, happy or sad

Why, somebody, why people break-up
Oh, turn around and make-up
I just can't see
You'd never do that to me
Would you, baby?
Just being around you is all I see


Here's what I want us to do 

Let's, we ought to stay together
Loving you whether, whether
Times are good or bad, happy or sad
Come on 

Let's, let's stay together
Loving you whether, whether
Times are good or bad, happy or sad
AZLyrics 

Wounded Minds is one of the first videos I did in 2006. It is about staying together....

This is how we heal....with hope of better days!

PTSD Patrol Kathie Costos January 21, 2021 I am sure you've heard the term "positive thinking" but I think that should be chan...

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It is your life, get in and drive it